The IRS Notice

Yesterday, I got a notice from the IRS that said that they were showing an overpayment from Jon and me. They needed the two of us to sign a form and tell them how much should go to each of us. I naturally sent Jon an email and asked him when he could be available to sign it. When he called me, I asked him if he had received his federal tax refund yet and he said he hadn't . I said that in all likelihood this was his refund. He came over.

Within thirty seconds in the house, we were back to our typical married pattern of behavior! I asked him what the amount of his refund was and he said he didn't even look. I got aggravated as that is a relevant piece of info to know when determining who should get what. He said it didn't matter and I immediately started to look it up (I had to do his tax return earlier in the year). I got the amount, calculated how much was his and how much was mine, filled out the form, passed it to him to sign, assembled the envelope, stamped it and gave it to him to drop off at the post office.

I was annoyed the entire time because he was passive, letting me take care of all of the business. Then he left. It could not have been more than five minutes and yet it was instantaneously back to the same old feelings and behaviours. We are definitely creatures of habit!

There are moments during the week when I wonder if a divorce was the right thing to do. Then a letter comes in the mail, I spend five minutes with Jon and I realize that it was absolutely the right thing to do. We have grown to the point where we bring out the worst in each of us. He gets passive and lazy; I get sarcastic and nasty. That is no life for either of us.

As he drove off, I shook my head and reflected on how quickly the tension manifested. It may be like this for the rest of our lives, maybe not. But we are definitely no good together. I am healthy (I think), busy, productive and contribute to my community. I cannot think how things could get much better at this point in time. And that is probably why I am seeing more rainbows in my life!